My little Luca Jack: I love you with every fibre of my being. Seriously, my heart literally aches for you when I’m not with you or when I know you’re sad or sick. You look like your Daddy but you also have much of “me” in you.
Some say its merely physical qualities that you have that resemble me, but I know that it’s so much more than that.
I can’t say that I know all that much about the Zodiac, but you and I are both Gemini children and we have so many of the same personality traits that I believe in “the stars” more and more as each day passes.
Like me, you’re an emotional child. You’re so easily affected by your surroundings. If someone close to you is happy, you’re happy. If someone is sad, you’re sad too. You feel so much and you’re able, at such a young age, to express these emotions so easily, wiith me, at least … and I believe that this is because we are so similar. When you’re upset, it breaks my heart. When you know you’ve done something wrong or when you’re in trouble for something, I can feel your regret or sorrow. Our hearts bear such resemblance that it’s a little scary sometimes.
You’d think that having a child who is just so … well, EXACTLY the same as you would mean that you’d be in perfect harmony, 24/7.
But it ain’t that easy.
In fact, it can be freaking hard. See, I have a tendency to jump in to “save” you from any potential emotional hurt … from the smallest of disciplinary efforts from your loving, caring, well-meaning Daddy, to your sudden, frustrating, behavioural patterns, which include being “scared” of so many things, being “sad” or “sick” when, in fact, you’re perfectly fine. I need to learn how to let you be exposed to other people’s’ rules, disciplines and ideas of how to raise children. As hard as it is for me, I need to let you learn these things … all by yourself.
You’re loved, you’re cared for, you’re healthy and you’re happy. But you’re going through a phase that (according to fellow moms of kids the same age as you, the pediatrician, the clinic Sister and even *gulp* PARENTING books and websites) is apparently 100% normal and totally age-appropriate. You can be very moany … who am I kidding, you’re currently driving us
bat-shit-crazy NUTS with your whining, from dawn to dusk. From the moment your eyes open, the sing-song voice and painfully annoying whine-fest starts:
- I waaaaaaant juuuuuuuice
- I waaaaaaant num-num (Jungle Oats)
- I waaaaaaant to watch ‘Jate’ & The Pirates
- I waaaaaaant to go to Se-eeendipity
- I waaaaaaany YOU mooooooom
There’s not much that’s said without a whine, to be honest. What’s most frustrating is that Anna has reported back to me that you’re a pleasure during the day. It’s really only when Daddy and I are around. WHY?!
Some say that it’s age-appropriate. Some say that it’s because your baby brother, Mika Alex, who you have been pretty ambivalent about for the last 10 months, has started to turn into a real little person and it’s (for lack of a better word) pissing you off that he’s now demanding more attention from your Daddy and I. You’ve also been a little bit sick lately and you’ve also slowly been mastering the art of the Number 2 in the Loo. So you’ve got a lot going on at the moment and, just like me, you tend to get ever so slightly overwhelmed when there’s loads happening.
So, my Noodle, I’m here for you. I am going to be as patient as I possibly can be, while also trying to maintain my sanity. So when you tell me, “I NEEEEEEEEED you Mom!”, just give me two minutes to go grab a
jug glass of wine before we snuggle on the couch to watch another an episode of Doc McStuffin/Kerwhizz/Lunar Jim or build a huge train-track together, because I KNOW that’s what you need from me to make you a happier little guy.
I love you with all of my heart, always.